To feel as if life is worth living we must have a few key items. We must have our health, a roof over our heads, enough food in our stomachs, and love. For some people this might not be enough. Some of us cannot survive without ambition, and drive, and success. Personally, I think think these things come second.

I have an aunt that says that for a woman marriage is the most important thing in the world, that no woman can be happy without a man. I think this is ridiculous. Marriage is important, to both sexes, but it is not the end all and be all to life. Love and marriage are not even synonymous with each other. Two people can happily be together for years without any further commitment from one another. I firmly believe this, as long as the two people do strongly love each other. If that love isn't there, then they shouldn't bother with the commitment to begin with. The only reason people need that endorsement of their love, is because they do not trust each other. Not that I blame them. Trust has to be earned, it should not be freely given. We all do little things in out daily lives that make others question our behavior. We are innately curious creatures, prone to asking each other, "why?" when we should instead leave well enough alone.

It's amazing actually that there are people out there that manage to stay in long term relationships whether it's with a friend, a parent, or a beau (boo for you modernists). We are taught at such a young age that we cannot trust, how do we, or some of us anyway, overcome this?

I think I somehow missed my point. What makes life worth living? I guess it's something different for everyone. So what makes me happy? I enjoy security and stability in my life. Surprises make me nervous, depending of course on the level of the surprise. I do not enjoy change all that much, in fact, mostly, I downright hate it. I like spending time with my friends, and my boyfriend, even though as far as I am concerned this does not happen often enough. I enjoy planning my future. I picture myself with my loved ones in my apartment sitting on the Lancaster couch from Restoration Hardware (I love that damn couch!). I enjoy writing, and making up stupid meaningless little stories. I do enjoy my time spent alone as well, really. I find thinking fun. I actually think one of my greatest joys in life comes from planning. Planning parties, planning for the far future, the near future, meals to cook. If I can plan for it, I'll try to do it. I like the planning more than the events themselves. Spontaneity is good too, up to a point. When I cannot guess what's going to happen in the future, I get nervous. I never know what's going to happen for sure, none of us do. Sometimes though we can have an idea. When the idea suddenly is changed on us though... I find it disconcerting.

Am I happy? I have my health (as far as I know), I have a roof over my head, I have enough to eat, and at least I think I have love. My life should be worth living. I do not want to give it up, but no, at the moment I am not happy. I am confused. I feel hurt and somewhat betrayed. I'm angry. I am not always right, but I am not always wrong either. I do not have a degree in psychology, I don't even have a degree in English yet, but I am not an idiot. There are some things in life that we cannot control, sometimes, most of the time, our happiness is among them. What we can control, we should hang on to though. We will not always be happy in our lives, and sometimes we have to make a big change in order to achieve that happiness, but most of the time we have to muddle through and find happiness in another area of our lives.

That's life. Why can't people accept that?

So I haven't blogged in a while. There's a shock, right? Haha! Nothing new much been going on. I'm still going to work and school. At the moment I'm in the process of getting sick. I haven't gotten the flu yet this year, when everybody around me has, maybe it's about time.

Anyway, since my last post, nothing bad happened. No life or death decisions to make. Choices are a high and mighty thing to speculate about when you don't actually have any to make, but when faced with an actual important decision... you might just find that you'll surprise yourself.

So this past Sunday were a couple of crazy birthday parties. The kids were pretty good, I was just lacking in staff. Nobody likes to go in the water. Honestly, I don't blame them. This little fact just makes my life a little more difficult. It worked out all right though in the end. We got to keep half an ice cream cake and three pizzas. Always a good thing. Unfortunately, I didn't get to eat any of it. I'm not sure where the pizzas went, but the cake ended up of the floor. Yes, someone knocked it on the floor. Whatever.

So, I mentioned I'm still in school. I've been wondering when I'm going to be finished already. I'm a junior, so you'd automatically assume that I'd be done in about a year, right? Wrong. I'm have about 70 credits, I need 120. Since I finished almost all of my liberal arts requirements, I just need to concentrate on my major. I'm an English major. Since I can't take four or five English classes at one time without going crazy, I'm planning on being there forever. Not to mention I'm probably going to go for my masters afterwards... So yeah, I plan to be in school for the next ten years. Now that might be an over exaggeration, but it'll be something like that.

So, does anybody have any ideas for me?

What does one do when they have a problem and cannot possibly make a good decision? There sometimes are the right decisions and sometimes there really aren't any. People do the best they can with the circumstances they are given. Do they always handle themselves with grace and dignity along the way? No. As long as they make it to the end of the day, whether their heads are held high or not... it's all the matters.

There is nothing easy in life. Try to stay young and carefree as long as you can.

Ok, I've got nothing to say. I'm just proud of myself for remembering my password. I have so many passwords for so many different things, that I tend to have to go through a bunch before I hit the right one for the program I am trying to use.

Anyway, I had a very long day. Last night I did not try to even go to sleep until about 5:30am. I woke up at 9:00am and left the house at 9:15. Ain't I fast? Anyway, I went to work. Dealing with five year old kids early in the morning is just too much. Crying, screaming brats. Don't get the idea that I don't like kids, I do, but thirty kids all yealling in the morning is... a bit too much to deal with. At the end of the party, which by the way lasted an extra forty five minutes, they gave out goody bags. You're thinking this is a good thing. But no. It depends what is in these goody bags. In these, there were the worst possible thing to give to kids. WHISTLES! Can you believe it!? They walk up behind you, whistle in your ear, and run away laughing. It's just... GREAT!

So I left forty five minutes late, with a pounding headache. I was picked up by my stepfather and stepbrother along with my mother. We all were going to the American Museum on Natural History. I don't know about you, but there are certain exhibits there I find very depressing. People went hunting at some point, shot some animals, brought them back to America, and had people stuff them, to make them look alive again. I personally am an animal lover, and find this very hard to take. It depressed me greatly. I was also totally exhausted, and starving. We had these citi passes that were supposed to get us into all the shows. However, all but two were sold out. We chose to see the Planetarium show. I was so tired that as soon as the voice came over the loud speaker (Robert Redford), I fell asleep. I actually did want to see the show. Did I mention that I hadn't eaten all day.

After walking around the museum for a few hours we were all about to pass out. We finally ate dinner. It was ehh. We then went back to FH and then to Starbucks.

Anyway now I'm home and still quite exhausted..... going away now...

So my two year anniversary with my boyfriend is coming up on Sunday. I think that's a pretty long time. It is for me anyway, and him also. We love each other very much. I'm a pretty cynical person, so that's a big deal for me. We're recreating our first date on Sunday. We tried doing that last year, but somehow it didn't work. We went to the city with a friend to see an art exhibit, and then to Jekyll and Hyde's. It's an... interesting restaurant. By the time we got back to my house it was rather late and we weren't hungry. We didn't even start thinking about food until at least 9pm. To make a long story short the restaurant was closed by the time we got there. We ended up eating at another nice restaurant, but it just wasn't the same. I ended up crying at the table. I don't even know why, exactly, it just was not what it was supposed to be. This year I'm actually thinking about making reservations. I don't usually bother doing that, but it might give us the incentive to get there somehow. Hehe. We'll get all dressed up, have a night on the town, so to speak. The problem with our anniversary is its proximity to Valentines Day.

First of all I must start by saying that I think VD is a bunch of bull shit. I think it's a meaningless Hallmark holiday. That being said, I do actually want to see my boyfriend on that day. I don't really expect him to get me anything, except maybe a rose, but I want to see him. Problem is, he has class that night, so unless I hang around campus for an extra hour or so, I'm not gonna see him, unless... all you bloggers out there convince him to come see me after class :- P

Anyway, I'm going to sleep. Later people of blog land.

Ok, so I know I haven't posted in... well, almost 3 months. I've been really busy with school. Actually, I think I've gotten over the blogging thing. At least perhaps until I have something interesting to say. Maybe I should delete my blog, it's not like anybody reads it. *shrug*

I don't like deleting things, it's a neurosis I guess. Things that I start, that are mine, I'm very protective over. If I make something, I don't like giving it away, or destroying it. You might be asking, what can this possibly correspond to except this blog. Well, you'd be surprised.

Firstly, there's term paper's. You know those websites that sell term paper's? Well, I run one... Ok, I don't. But it was a fun thought. Anyway, this hasn't come up in a while. Maybe I've mosty gotten over it, or perhaps, I just haven't created anything in a while. The last time I remember this happening is... maybe 13 years ago. I gave my mother's ex boyfriend an old doll of mine... I was miserable until he gave it back. Actually, that took a lot of convincing on the boyfriend's part, he was kind of a baby. My mother had to yell at him to get him to give it back.

Anyway, my point is that, I don't think I could give up my blog so easily. Maybe I'll even start writing in this thing again...

OK, I know I haven't posted in a while. This blog started out as a way for me to keep up my writing skills... Not sure how much it's helped actually. I haven't written in a while, nothing really exciting going on with me. Started school. Fun, fun, fun. What more is there to say?

I'm actually sitting here waiting for Rich to call. I'm tired, not even sure from what. I have school tomorrow, I'm acutally contemplating not going. Nothing major is going on, but if I miss a math class, I probably won't be able to keep up anymore. I'll probably go, late maybe. I don't want to go to my first class. I actually enjoy it, but we had to do this really stupid assignment, which I didn't do as of yet. I'll probably do it before I go to sleep. I'm rambling.

So, L___ is in town. She's been here for about a month actually, she's leaving this coming Tuesday. We didn't do anything major, really we didn't do anything much at all. She's going to a concert with D___ on Friday night. She doesn't seem to remember that she was invited to my house for dinner. Just as well, I'm not in the mood to entertain people, I'd rather be entertained. I have tickets to a comedy club. Rich and I might go Saturday, we'll see. He's probably going to some sort of meeting in the morning, so why would he want to go back to the city a few hours later. Maybe the following weekend.

I have no idea what I'm saying anymore, my brain is mush. I'm so out of it. Also, I'm quite thirsty. Maybe I should go upstairs and fill up my water bottle, hmm... Such a dilemma, to stay put, or to go upstairs, that is the question.

Blah, blah, blah. Someone tell me something interesting.

I haven't written in my blog in about two months. I'm not sure why exactly. I guess I haven't had that much to say. I've just been working for the summer. same place different job. I haven't worked the Sports Clinic in about five years. Actually, as far as enjoying my job goes, I prefer the art department during the summer. It's air conditioned and I don't have to yell all the time. The gym is fun though. I get to hang out with my friends (just not the same ones I'd be with if I were in the art department), I get to play games with the kids, and I even get to go swimming with them! Wait. That's all the stuff I don't like about my job. It's more work, it's harder, and there's more responsibility, sort of. I don't mind any of that, I would just like to relax once in a while during the summer.

I was supposed to go away with Rich this past week. We had planned to go to Pennsylvania. To visit the Amish country and then to take a little excursion to Hershey Park. I've never been to either of those places. Well, we didn't get to go. I got sick at the wrong time. I thought it was just my period, but it turned out to br a stomach virus or a flu of some sort. I always get sick at least once a summer, but did it really have to happen now? Anyway, so we didn't go away. There really is no other time to go, so I'm stuck here for the remainder of the summer. Maybe when Liat comes to visit, I'll go away with her. The time for Rich and me is over.

So, for the past week, I've been sitting around, not doing much of anything except throwing up. Until Thursday night anyway. Thursday I went out with all my co-workers to dinner at TGI Friday's. We had fun, then separated. I ended up going to get ice cream with three of them after dinner. It was fun, a good first night back out in the world. Yesterday, I could've gone to work, but chose not to. I just went in eventually to pick up my paycheck. I ended up leaving the Y with D_______. We walked her daughter home and then she and I went to Marshall's and Target. I've never been to Marshall's. I like it! Lol. I got a bag. My second bag of the summer. This one however only cost about $25.00. The other one cost $135.00, on sale. So, I think I did pretty well there lol. OK, at Target D_______ was trying to find party favors for her daughter's birthday party on Sunday. So, I helped her. Since I love that stuff, and school supplies also, I had a good time. The only problem was that the shoes I was wearing, were really starting to hurt. So I ended u buying a pair of flip flops for $2.99. I think that was a pretty good buy. They're very comfortable.

After the shopping, D_______ and I went our separate ways. She went home, and I went to my dad's house to hang out with my little Daniel cat. My father didn't get home from upstate until after 12:00am. Danny was alone all day, so he was happy to see me. I got a slice of pizza and ate it, then I vegged out for an hour or so until my boyfriend called. We've been fighting a lot lately, so we were talking very carefully on the phone.

Anyway, my father got home eventually, then took me home.

The only other news I have to report is that my grandmother was taken to the hospital yesterday. She has pneumonia and can't breathe on her own. She's been intubated. For those of you who don't know what that means... They put a tube down her throat to help her breathe. We don't know if they will ever be able to take the tube out. She's 99 with dementia. I wish they would just let her go, stop making her suffer. *Sigh*.

I'm a horrible person. I was walking around this afternoon. I seem to be in the midst of a allergy attack. It's a little odd since I don't usually have allergies at all. Anyway, I was carrying some bags because as I walking around I bought some food. I was walking home, when these two people came running out of their house carrying what looked to be an unconscious child. He was blue in the face. There was another person standing there, a passerby, she was calling 911.

I just walked away. I don't know the etiquette for these things. I mean, there was nothing I could do, I don't know CPR and 911 was already being called. I still feel like I did something morally wrong by just walking away. What could I have done? I have no idea. Was I supposed to try to offer support to hyspterical people I don't know?

What I do know is that I will never get the image of the suffocating child out my head. It was the singularly most disturbing thing I have wittnesed in my life.

I'm disgusting.

Ok, back to the old mac. I'm not sure what I was so excited about last time. I mean, sure it's nice to be able to change my colors and what not, but really, who cares. This is a blog. This is not myspace, or facebook, or whatever else is centered more on graphics. This blog, as I have birthed it, has been about writing. I can post whatever I want in terms of writing with this lovely computer, hereby known as mac (I am aware of the un-originality of this just so you know, but I like it). So mac and I are back again writing for... Ok, I haven't yet figured that out yet. For fun I guess, because I like writing. I'll just leave it at that.

So, since last I wrote I went to the beach. I played miniature with Rich, he won of course. He always wins. I'm not sure i've ever won at anything actually. I don't just mean games with Rich, just in general. I mean I've won awards at school, but I guess I mean game wise. Anyway, I'm rambling. So, we went to the beach, played mini golf, lay on the beach for a while and then... I'm trying to remember what we did and also when we did it. I know we had dinner at Rich's house two nights, and I made dinner one night. I don't think we went out at all that weekend, not for dinner anyway. We went to Oasis cafe I think on the same night we went to the beach. I know I made lemon chicken (very good by the way) on Monday evening. We ate Rich's house on Sunday night, that was steak night. It was very very good. I think I'm officially done with that weekend. I'll talk to Rich, maybe he can clear up my memory lol.

Anyway, the following weekend, or this past one if that's what you'd like to call it, Rich went back to Gettysburg PA to build some fences on the battle field. I'm not sure I get it exactly, you're just gonna have to ask Rich about that. Anyway, Friday night I ate at home with my mom and Harold. I just fell asleep watching TV eventually. Saturday, I sat around not doing much of anything until the afternoon. Then I went to Austin St. and tried to do some chores (stupid Verizon stores). I ended up getting picked up by my mom, and we went shopping. Sunday, a cousin of mine, of some degree, had a birthday party. It was her 95th. So my mom, Harold, my cousin Bernard and his mom all went together. The shopping my mom and I had done was for this birthday party. I mean surrounded my relatives you haven't seen in years and years, you gotta look good, no? So, that lasted longer than we thought it would. We didn't get home until maybe 6:30. I couldn't really eat anything at the party, not my kind of food. So, when we got home I made a multi cheese baked ziti. I had half and my mother ate the other half. I finally just fell asleep.

Monday was pretty much normal. Rich came home that day. I didn't see him though, he was too tired and achy (no more fences!). Later in the day I went to work. Apparently, there was a half day for students, so there were only three students per class. Tuesday, was just Tuesday. I didn't do much of anything. Wednesday was going pretty much the same as Tuesday... until the mail came.

I got into Queens College!!! After sharing my news with everyone I could think of via phone, or text message, I walked to my father's house. I ended up spending the day completely alone. My father didn't get home until about 11:30pm. He just took me home when he got back. So that was my Tuesday. Wednesday I spent a lot of time on the phone with Rich. I was in a lot of pain, still am kinda. I have my period. Anyway, I walked to my dad's house, we had dinner (pizza), and then Rich came over. We hung around my dad's house for a while then he took me to a cafe. After that he had to go home. He's working today, so he had to wake up early.

Today, I woke up late since I couldn't fall asleep last night. Then my dad picked me up and we went food shopping. He's going away for the next few days, so I'm house and cat sitting. I'm not working today because it's Brooklyn/Queens Day. Please don't ask me to explain that, I can't. So, all it means to me, is that I don't have work today and that all the schools in Brooklyn/Queens are closed to students today as well. Later I might see an old friend, might not. Who knows? I might see Rich, might not. I will probably just go to sleep and curl up with my cat.

So, that's been my life for the past week-ish. I will continue to keep you updated, because I know you all care so much.

So, anyway, this is my first time blogging from a computer other than my own. I'm on my boyfriend's laptop... which is a PC... whereas I usually am on my laptop... which is a Mac. There are more functions over here. I love Macs. They are easier to use, they almost never get viruses, and are just so much adarn cuter than PC's. However, since nothing, or next to nothing is specifically written for us Apple people, everything works better on PC's! It's just so darn unfair... waaaa!!!

Anyway, now that I've comandeered someone else's computer... I see things such as "Edit HTML," diiferent setting in the compose mode (such as: center, align left...). I see the option of making my text a different color, I see the option to use italic and bold font! I see differnt fonts!!! I seem to be in blogging heaven! I've neer before figured out how people do the things they do with their blogs. Now it all makes sense... they aren't Mac users!

Ok, let me ue some of this fancy stuff I didn't know was here. Oh! Blue!!! Look, I'm blue and italic!! Woohoo!! Maybe some red to show how angry I am that Mac users don't have any blogging options on them! Some purple to show that, I have in fact calmed down a bit. If I had any pictures on this compter I would put them in my blog now... I can just imagine how much easier it would be on this here PC.

Ok, so for the moment, I am done ranting at the injustice of the world. I will tell you instead that I saw Shrek the Third yesterday. It was hilarious! Ok, maybe it wasn't the singularly most funny thing I have seen in my life, but it was pretty damn good! Rich and I saw the 10:45 showing. We expected it to be crowded, full of loud teenagers howling at the screen. Quite the opposite in fact, we were the only ones there! Ok, well it didn't stay that way. Once the movie started there were a few stragglers who came in... maybe four or five couples. It's really too bad though, I wouldn't have minded having the whole theater just for Rich and myself. Actually, that would have been really cool. It would of been like having rented out the space for the duration of the movie. I think theater do that.. don't they? Don't you think it would been nice having only paid $20 for the tickets to have entire place to yourself? Well, I do.

So, after the movie Rich and I went back to his house. Rich has been pretty much been writing papers straight for six weeks, even eighty seven pages in two days, and the whole ordeal just finished this past Thursday. So he is totally and utterly exhausted. It's also crazy hot here, not to mention humid. So... I don't know what I can say, Rich went to bed. He gave me a book to read, but I really wasn't in the mood. So, I stuck my ipod in my ears and just lay down. It was quite hot in Rich's room, getting progressively hotter as morning approached. So, I don't think anyone in the house slept too well.

Anyway, I'm going to go now give up the wonder of the PC. Gotta go eat something!

So, I didn't get a summer job today. I know that needs more explination, but honestly I'm not in the mood right now. I'm too tired. Not sure why I'm writing actually. I got nothing to say.

My boyfriend is busy killing himself with work this week. He's writing two papers. One due on Wednesday and one due on Thursday. He's killing himself because he refuses to sleep. He's basically just working straight through. Poor baby. I've got to remember not to get mad at him if, when, he fallls asleep early this Friday. He's been working so hard. I would like to do anything I can to make him have a good weekend. I really do love him.

Anyway, I have nothing else to say, so I'm going to go now.

So, yes it was my birthday. Thank you for the birthday wishes Vinny my blog's only commentator lol.

So, that evening I went to dinner with my mother, step dad, father, his girlfriend, and my boyfriend. We went to a fancy Italian restaurant, had dinner. It was nice. That was pretty much it for my birthday. My boyfriend and I wanted to go out later, just us, but we were just too tired. I don't even remember what we ended up doing we were so tired.

Saturday, we were also totally out of it. We went to have lunch down the block at a nice cafe. After we just went back to my house. We hung around and then he took me to dinner at this nice pan asian restaurant in his area. Then he was all sweet and got me an ice cream cake. He went home around 1:30am and that was it for my birthday.

Sunday, I worked 9:00-4:30. Four birthday parties back to back. I'm still recovering from that. Hectic mania! I can't wait for this weekend. Actually, it's not like I'm doing much the rest of the week. I have work on Friday and Sunday, but I have off Thursday and next Monday because of a Jewish holiday and Memorial Day. So, I should be cleaning my room or something, but because I don't feel especially well, I'll probably just lie around all day.

I'm not very exciting, I know. Meanwhile I have to tell you that my father has stolen my cat. My cat clings to him in the most uncat like way. I mean seriously the way he adores my dad is just agonizing to watch. I miss my little baby. I just always thought that I would take him back when I moved in with Rich, or into my own place. I don't think I can though. I mean I've been telling my father for years, since his cat died, that he needed another one. Now that he's got mine, I don't think he's going to give him up. Besides, it would probably be best for Danny if he stayed with my dad. I guess I could get another cat, and I'm sure I will... But I really love Danny. I keep losing my cats. The first kitten died of feline leukemia. Her name was Deanna. I really miss her sometimes. Then I got Danny about a year later. He's almost 5 now. He would have always live with me if it wasn't for the construction on my house. He had to move in with my dad. He's been there now for over a year. I can't just uproot him. He made a life there. I know that sounds crazy, because he's a cat, but it's true. My cat is totally in love with him. It's disgusting. This feline form of gushing, it's just unprecedented. Cats just don't gush, except over my father. They all love him. I don't get it. He has this animal, and I mean animal, magnetism. It's crazy. So, I guess I have to say good bye to Danny. He is no longer my kitten. I really miss him. One of the reasons I've been so lonely is because he's not here anymore. I guess there's really nothing I can do about it. I can't afford him anyway.

Well, now I've depressed myself, so I'm going to go. Laterz people, I'm outtie!

Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me... happy biiiiirthday to me-eee, happy birthday to me.

how old am i now, how old am i now, how oooooold am i no-owww, how old am i now?

I am 22 years old now, i am 22 years old now, i am 22 year old no-owww, i am 22 years old now!

Ok, I'm writing again. I seem to feel that keeping the world updated on my current life circumstances is not as important as I used to think it was. I no longer think I have any knowledge to impart on the world, not at the moment anyway. All I ever wrote about is time spent with my boyfriend. I'm not saying that time spent with him is not important, because it most certainly is. My time with him is the happiest that I ever am. I love being with him, and I love spending time with him. If I could do it, I would spend every waking hour with him. Obviously I can't do that. I'm not even sure if I examined it closely, that it would be a good idea. I mean I personally don't think that couples should be together all the time. I think that it would put too much stress on the relationship. Fights would pop up all the time, fights about nothing. Fights about just being together 24/7.

Just at this point in my life, I am not incredibly happy. I am only happy when I am with my boyfriend. My best friend (other than my boyfriend) is still living in another country, and I'm not even sure she is ever coming back for good. I'm not in school, I'm only working three times, maybe four times a week. I sit home alone the majority of the time. I'm not always miserable, but I'm not unduly happy all the time either. Not that I should be. I mean who is? There's just something in my live missing and I'm not too sure what it is. I need to move on with my life, and this year it's been pretty stagnant. I haven't really looked for another job, even though I kept saying I was going to. I guess I'm scared to change my ways. I've been working there so long... It's the only place I've ever worked. I was never a big fan of change.

I don't know. All I know is that something's got to change. It will too. I'm going back to school by hook or by crook next semester. I'm not sure where I'm going to be going, but I will be somewhere. I will go back to community college if I have to, but I need to get my life, my adult life started already. I'm going to be majoring in English, so maybe that writing in my blog will improve. :- D.

Anyway, I'm going to go further contemplate my life.... Or maybe I'll just watch TV. Either way... Laterz pople!!

Ok, I know I haven't written in a while. I guess I should apologize, but I honestly don't know who I'd be apologizing to. I mean since nobody ever comments my blog, how should I know if there's anybody but me who's reading it?

I'm not going to bother filling you in on every weekend since I last wrote. I mean, I can't remember the details and well, what's the point of rehashing? So, I'll stick to this past weekend. I went to Rich's house Friday night, and we had dinner with his entire immediate family. There was a baseball game on, Yankees vs. Red Sox. The whole family is totally deranged about baseball. I mean, it was on in the background during dinner, then all of the sudden Alex Rodriguez hits a home run and almost all the men at the table jumped up and ran for the TV. I have never seen Rich's father so excited about something before, never seen him jump up and run before. It was cute. So that was Friday night. Saturday, Rich planned to do some work. He's writing a paper for one of his classes. Somehow he never got around to it. I can't even tell you what was going on. We woke up around 10:00AM. We got dressed, went downstairs, Rich had breakfast. His brother and sister in law had breakfast. We all talked for a little bit. Then his brother walked his wife to the train station. In the time he was gone, Rich and I just hung around and talked. Some serious stuff, some nothing stuff. You know how conversations go. While we were talking his parent's got home from work. His brother was still not back from the train station, and it had been over and hour since he had left. Rich's mom thought something had happened to him, so understandably she was quite upset. When he finally made it back, there was a slightly hysterical reunion, which I thought was quite sweet. So, when we were all there, we all helped Rich's dad take the hard top off his car. He has a convertible, so there's the hard roof and the soft roof. For the winter the hard roof is protecting against snow and stuff. I guess for the spring summer, it's not necessary. That's really all I know about it.

So after the excitement of the car stuff, we went back inside and had lunch. There was bagels and lox. I had a grilled cheese bagel. After lunch, Rich went downstairs to check about job fair stuff (I'll explain more about that next time I write). So he was doing that stuff, while his brother showed us pictures he took from the UAE. Pretty nice pictures. Anyway, Rich was gone a while, so I went to go find him. We ended up getting into a fight. I'm not going into that though. So, it was about 4:00PM. Rich had told me he would stop working by three, meanwhile, he hadn't even started and it was already four. So, we went outside to his yard. He took his books, and I took mine. We were still mad at each other. So, we weren't doing much reading, either of us. We got up and I asked Rich to teach me how to punch. He used to take karate, and apparently he was very good. So he was trying to teach me how to punch. So, I was standing there punching the palms of his hands. It's certainly fun to punch when you need to get aggression out. And, well, if you're punching the person who aggravated you to begin with... You get the idea. So we got our aggressions out. I was trying to knock him down, he was running for me. I guess we were sort of rough housing. Hehe, I've never done that before. Anyway, when we were done with that, we talked everything out. Later, we went to dinner at Tofu, a nice Chinese/Japanese restaurant in Bayside. We shared some cold noodles in sesame sauce. We each got soup, and we sort of shared our main dishes (Chicken Lo mein, and Chicken with peanuts). After that, we went to Barnes & Noble. I got a book I've been looking for, for a while. Then we just went back to my house. We watched a little TV and Rich went home.

Sunday, I had work. Two tiny tumbler birthday parties. The kids were cute, and we got tips from both parties, so that was good. After work I went to my dad's house and visited my cat (my dad wasn't there). My mom picked me up around 5:30 and we went to visit my grandparents. After that we went to The Family Restaurant. My mom told me she was going to Yale for four days. Her school sent her there. We just went home after that. My weekend was over.

Monday, I went to work, but couldn't stay with the class for more than five minutes at a time. I had to keep going to the bathroom. I have a UTI. I don't recommend them. Not so much fun. Now, it's Tuesday and I still have my UTI and am sitting here near the bathroom for the day. I'm trying to decide if I should try walking to my dad's house later. Too bad I don't have a port-a-potty to take along with me.

So, there is the update on my life. Hope you enjoyed! Bye people.

i know i haven't written in a while, and i will, i promise. however, it will not be right now. right now, i don't seem to be able to capitalize. laterz

So, since last I wrote some things have happened. First of all, I still need to get to Macy's. I'm still looking for pants that don't have holes in the crotch... I can't quite figure out why their are holes there to begin with actually, hehe.

So, not this past weekend, but the one before (3/17/07) my mom and stepdad met Rich's parents, for the first time. I think the whole thing went pretty well. They seemed to get along. I don't really have very much else to say about that.

I went to my old college last Wednesday and picked up a copy of my transcript. I sent in my application for college on Thursday. So, now I'm just waiting to see what happens.

This past weekend (3/24/07) my boyfriend and I recreated our first date. We haven't had time to since our anniversary (2/3). So, we went to the same Japanese restaurant (I ordered the same thing, he didn't), and after that we went to the local pool hall. We both sincerely suck. That's ok though, we still have fun. Earlier in the day, we were so tired we could barely move. I made peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches for lunch and then we just fell asleep :- P. When we finally made it out of the house we went to this new mall in a neighboring town. It was actually a very nice place, for a mall. It is an outdoor mall and had different stores in it than most places near here. I pre-ordered Harry Potter #7 at Borders, hehe. It was just a good place to walk around. The only downside is that it's right across from a cemetary, so that's kind of depressing.

We had planned to go see a movie before dinner, but since we didn't start out of the house until after 4PM... yeah, it didn't happen.

Next week, hopefully, my boyfriend and I are going to go away. Just to MA, probably Boston. We both just need to get away. Hopefully next time we go away, it can be a little farther. I need a better job first, then I can pay. I kind of want to go to England, and Italy, and France. Although, right now, I would gladly settle for Florida, hehe.

Anyway, I'll write more later. Tell me something you people out there.

I think I've calmed down a bit since my last ranting blog post. I still want all the things I mentioned before, but not in a "I'll die if I can't get it" kind of way. At some point this week, I'm going to try to put together some outfit, a nice one. Next week I think I'm going to apply for jobs in Bloomingdales, Saks, and maybe Lord & Taylor. Just thinking of it makes me nervous. I've only ever worked at my current place of employment. Different departments, different bosses, but still the same place with me basically doing the same thing. I've never done anything else. I don't really have any other skills. I mean, I work with people. That's a skill that comes in pretty handy just about anywhere, no matter what you're doing. So, there's that. I guess other than that, you're just trained on the job. I mean, I can be a perfume girl. It's not something I ever aspired to be, but I can do it. And I can give people makeovers, clothes wise, and even make up. So, it's not like I have no skills that a department store might want. I don't know, just nervous I guess.

Anyway, I do still want to get out of town. I think during Pesach (or spring break if you prefer), I'm gonig away with my boyfriend. I mean we aren't going anywhere warm or anything. I think we're going to Boston. However, at least we're getting out of town. Unfortunately, classes at work, end next week. I'm not exactly sure when Pesach is, but I know it's early April. Basically, I'm going to be totally broke for a month or more. I'm so glad. I guess if I beg my mother, she'll probably help me out a little bit. I hate begging my mother for money.

Looking at the silver lining... I get to go away with my boyfriend. We really need to spend some time alone together. He's been really busy lately, and I just want to be with him. I love him. He wants to be with me too by the way. I'm not stalking him. I don't even want to do all the historical things, I mean I do, I am interested. I just want to hang out and relax. You think I should still look for a job before I go away? I mean I could just tell them I'm not available until after I come back. I guess Rich and I will have to set the dates for us going and coming back. Maybe we'll figure it out this weekend.

I think I will end this blog since I am starting to ramble again. Ok people, talk to you all later!



(Just a reminder, I can't do spell check with this new version of blogger, so please, don't mind the typos, thanks)

People are really annoying me lately. I really need to get out of this town. I need to do something with my life. At least I need to get away for a little while. I haven't been out of town since the summer, when I went to Boston with Rich. I know that isn't exactly the longest I or others have been without a vacation. However, it's really time I get out of here. I don't even really care where I go... Although, If I were to be honest about it, I'd like to go somewhere warm. Somewhere where I don't really have to think about anything. I guess I want to go some place like Florida. It's too expansive though. I'm trying to save for a car. That means I can't really have anything else until I get a car. I haven't bought any clothes this winter. I bought one pair of shoes, but I needed them for an occasion. I've looked like crap all winter, and fall for that matter. I need to get my hair dyed. I need to get a hair cut while I'm at it. I sort of wish I came from a wealthy family, so that my parents could really support me. I mean, they put a roof over my head, and my father generally feeds me four times a week. But except for medical bills... I pretty much pay for everything I need while still trying to save for a car. I buy my own books, I buy my own clothes (when I get them), I pay for my own lunch, when I eat it. When I make dinner at home, I pay for all the seperate ingredients. I know it doesn't sound all that bad, but it really is. I work, but it's not like I make a hell of a lot of money. I generally make less than $200 a month. That works out fine, if nothing comes up, like people's birthdays, and also if I'm not trying to save for a car. My cat isn't even currently living with me. There are a few reasons for this, but one of the main reasons is that I honestly can't afford having a boyfriend and a cat. When I go out with my boyfriend, I don't expect him to pay for everything all the time. I pay for things also. So what ends up happening is that I spend like $40 a week on the two of us, mostly just for food. I used to spend $40 a week on the cat. So, that's how I can't afford both a boyfriend and my cat.

I really need another job. I don't even know where to look though. I don't especially want to work in retail, but I think I'm going to have to. Unless something else comes along, and why would it? Life just doesn't give you opportunities, you have to go out and get them. I can't really get anywhere, since I don't have a car... and since I don't have a car, I can't really get anywhere... It's my favorite little paradox. I'm probably going to end up applying for a job in the city. A big store I think... Macy's... and maybe Bloomingdales, we'll see. Maybe I'll apply to a Barnes&Noble, but I seriously don't want to stack and sort books. If I can find a job somewhere that involves writing in some way, that would be great. Somehow though, I don't see that happening. I guess when I go back to school, I'll have less time to worry about stuff, and also an excuse why I don't have another job....

I need to get another job before I go back to school, before the summer also. I need the money. I need to be able to save some money so that I can get a car and get to school... Also, I need the money once I have the car, so that I can pay for gas. Life should not be based around money. Seriously, we should find another way.

Far be it for me to compare life to Star Trek, but they figured out how to abolish the need for money, and we should seriously consider figuring out how to do that.

I think I'm done rambling now. But who knows, maybe I'll be back later....